Monday, May 2, 2011

Had Herpes For A Year Getting Worse

Natalie Portman, addiction and other stories


I love Natalie Portman. Well, his character, actually. But I'm ahead of things.

I've always liked the stories. And if these stories turn contain love stories, I like even more (basically I'm a romantic cursilero). And a funny thing happens to me when I was very attached to the characters in a book or a movie or a video game, is that when the story ends, I'm wanting to know more (of fond is easier if there is love story in between). As if to leave these characters, it would have gone with them a part of me. Or something well. The truth is that the feeling is quite confusing and not easy to explain.

The case is to produce a mixture of melancholy and depression that is strangely addictive. It happened with the trilogy of books of His Dark Materials with The Lord of the Rings , with the movie Pride and Prejudice ... and this weekend, with Natalie Portman and her characters in Thor and Compromise.

And it's funny, because it is a feeling that does not lead anywhere. So, I guess it's like falling in love with a character. Of course, the character only exists in history (not even the actor is the character), and you can not achieve in any way, just fantasizing (even though Natalie Portman know tomorrow is going to be difficult, would not fill the emotional emptiness that his character has been created .) So the feeling is, and I feel something is missing, and I'm sad and I fantasize about following the story with me in it, and then me with an idealized version of Natalie Portman, or his touch, or things of that nature. I do not want to stop feeling this way: although it's a bittersweet feeling, something in me that wants to continue with it. Come on, I'm a junkie.

Today I sat down to meditate, to concentrate, my mind kept thinking about these things, but there was a part of me that refused to focus because I wanted to keep turning!

And after a while (at first were months, then weeks, and now are a couple of days), the feeling goes, like everyone else, and I miss him. After more time passes, and continue with my life, meditating and appreciating every moment. Until reattach with something. I suppose that, over time, learn to let go of these feelings at the time, or ignore them (though the prospect of it not quite like me at all, like I'm addicted), but today, I fall like a fool. Is that Natalie is very pretty wood.

PD: indeed, the two movies that I have appointed Natalie are cool (nothing special, but cool), but perhaps I'm not objective ...

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